A Love Letter to Track and Field
Photo by: @jzsnapz
And just like that, a long chapter in my life has ended.
I pondered how and what to write in this post for a long time. My Olympic season (and career) ended in a very anti-climatic trickle. Instead of a bang and shout of making my last Olympic team, it whimpered to an end at a small meet in Jacksonville, Florida.
At my last meet, after my last race, I watched the rest of the events and took a moment to appreciate the experience. In these last few years of track, I’ve really learned to enjoy the journey and experiences as they come. As an athlete, it’s much too easy to become bogged down in the day-to-day. The endless training days and weeks; competitions week after week. I’ve been to a number of countries, but I can count on one hand the number of countries I can truly say I actually experienced.
Photo by: @shotbysleep
Photo by: @shotbysleep
I had the unique luxury of planning my retirement years in advance. I always planned to end my career during the Tokyo Olympic year. Of course, plans shifted slightly when the Olympics were delayed. Still, I tried to slow down in the bigger moments. I learned to bask in the gratitude and appreciation for each occasion, filing it all away for a time when this would all be just a fun memory.
Track taught me more than I ever thought it could. I learned what complete and utter exhaustion felt like after probably the hardest workouts I’ll ever experience. I learned discipline and sacrifice can come easy when you find a goal that speaks to you. I felt what it was like to achieve everything you aimed for and the highest highs, but in contrast, also felt the lowest lows. I truly understood the feeling of putting my all into something, trying my absolute best, and still failing.
In this last year, I allowed myself to think about all I had chosen to sacrifice for track. The things I’d be happy to re-explore in retirement. And in my last few months, I relished in everything track had given me in return. The countless friends, opportunities, and stories that continue to add color and happiness to my life.
I can’t imagine what my life would have been like had I decided not to continue my track career after college. I have no idea where I’d be or who I’d be. What I do know is that if I had to make the choice, I’d do it all again.
I caught up with a friend the other day and let her know I had officially ended my career. She asked if I was bummed about retiring. I took a moment to really think about that. And told her I wasn’t. I’m sure there will be weird points in the future when I’m watching meets and wishing I could be back out there, but in the long run, I’m happy with my decision. I’m ready to move on to the next chapter of my life. And while this door is closing, I'm excited to see the many that will open in its place.
Of course, I’ll keep writing, blogging, and sharing along the way. I hope you’ll continue reading and learning right along with me.
♡
Gemma
Photos courtesy of @jzsnapz & @shotbysleep
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